Valuable Lesson Learned--Do NOT Assume!

No...our vacation did NOT get extended. We have been back home since first week of February. Only we were caught up by raising money for Campfire USA for two weeks straight by selling candy in storefronts, often in the cold, day after day, weekend after weekend. Thankfully, we only do that once a year and it's finally over. The kids vowed not to participate again next year. OOOOOH, how dad would love to capture this on video and bring it out same time next year as a reminder! Nonetheless, we are very proud of each of our kids for wanting to help. Their salesmanship skills improved from that of last year. Though we missed the first week of selling, they still pulled through and sold 570 boxes in two weeks. Mind you...it was no easy task when every 9 out of 10 people they asked turned them down, some avoided them completely by entering stores through other entrances, and some wouldn't even acknowledge them.

Then, I had a very negative encounter with a newcomer who joined our local unschooling group briefly. She blasted me for telling her, a total stranger how to raise her young children with my "speal"--basically just enjoy playing with her children who are 3 and 5. I did not greet her any differently than I were with other newcomers. Time and again, I relfected upon my post to her how it could have perceived unkindly. I honestly couldn't find one but apologized to her anyhow and assured her my single view did not represent the group and wished her to stay and give others a chance to get to know her and her family. She appeared to be warming up to other members greeted her since my posts. The next day, she said she was contended with her eclectic approach using online resources with her children and left the group. Because of this incident, our sweet moderator made a few changes to the group. A few newer members plus one long-time member felt it was directed at them because they have kid(s) in school. Some of these members has left the group. I spent over an hour consoling one and assuring her the recent change was not directed at her and others and that they were/are not viewed as the invaders or outsiders. I think she will give the group a chance to get to know her and her family. I am glad I had that talk because I have been affected by ways how I reach out to others as I have been before this incident. It is uncharateristic of me and I hate it. God did not want me to change because how people may perceive me unjustly. I pray that we will move past this trial quickly without much more damage to our small circle of friends. I truly value what we've built here and hate to see it deterioted due to misunderstanding. "Man was not meant to communicate through a wire. The best of all of us is lost in the translation."

Last week has been a trying week, with my dear husband gone for three weeks for a business road trip, DS was struggling with respiratory challenge especially at nights. Consequently, I had no sleep for 4 nights in a row. Finally, he had his restful sleep the past two nights and I got mine.

The kids enjoyed another Spring-Day iceskating with our homeschooling circle of friends on Friday. Next day, they had a blast at a friend's pool party followed by a postponed birthday party at her home. Yesterday, the kids stayed with the same friend while I had my monthly Moms-Night-Out break with other homeschooling moms. It was the best healthy meal at a gathering I had in years plus we enjoyed each other's company while creating beaded jewelry. I did try to make a spiral bracelet or necklace but ended up organizing my supplies instead. I am having a creativity block...HELP!

Today, I woke up with a heavy heart, achy body, and feeling miserable. Poor DD#1 had to carry my load around the house. She made breakfast and lunch for everyone, fed the dogs, let them out to potty. By mid-day, I decided to ask a friend to take them to last swimming lesson later in the afternoon. She was so gracious to offer to keep them afterward. When she checked in around 4:30 pm, I was in no better condition than I was in the morning. She offered to keep the kids for dinner and would bring them home when she leaves to meet up with a girl friend at 7. She even went out her way to pick up some hot and sour soup to satisfy my craving. Oooh, she is a true friend in need! Thank you, Lord, for hearing my prayer.

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Here is an interesting research. For myself, I'm still on the fence about children playing videos or watching TV so I am not sure I'd draw all the same conclusions from the research. My husband feels strongly, negatively, it has nerval impact in oneself based on his long-time human/anatomy studies...it's his passion and absession. Though I won't pull our 6-year-old son away from his video games to play Simon Says, it's still good to see some of the "experts" discovering that free play is just as important for children as all those hours of soccer practice and piano lessons.

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It's great to be back, my friends...I am still updating old posts to remove names because a couple of our homeschooled moms expressed concerns of my naming photos of their children. It never struck me to ask for permission...so, I am sincerely sorry for my ignorance. Another valuable lesson learned. Don't assume!

I wish you all PEACE.

3 encouragements:

Makita said...

I'm so glad that you are continuing to blog - it's a great release (to journal & share). :)

I'm sorry about the reaction the newcomer had to your post - I certainly didn't think what you wrote was offensive - and especially after you tried to explain where you were coming from as you apologized (though I don't think an apology was necessary). Rest assured that those who are open to learning from others and who are like-minded will continue to join the group.

Many hugs! :)

Sarah said...

Thanks for your comfort, reassurance, and kind encouragement. I too am glad to get back in blogging. I agree. It has been a terrific venue to muse and share. I have found my grounding again. As for the one person sitting on the fence, I do hope she will hang out with us at COOL again.

We too are struggling here in homefront with illnesses. Yesterday was the worst for me. Today, I managed to run out and got fleece for 4H charity projects the girls will be making for the troops tomorrow.

Will we see you and kiddos on Friday for some leap frog fun? I think we may even go iceskating in the evening if all feel better. Are you game? It's nice to skate with people we like!

Makita said...

We'll be leap frogging in the afternoon :D but won't be able to skate... though we certainly WANT to. We'll be heading the coast after DH gets home from work for my Grandma's funeral. We are going to bring along the kite my little guy got for his birthday, though, in hopes we can spend a little time at the beach.

True learning-learning that is permanent and useful,that leads to intelligent action and further learning, can arise only out of the experience, interest, and concerns of the learner.
John Holt
Real heroes are men who fall, fail and are flawed, but win out in the end because they stayed true to their ideals, beliefs and commitments.
Actor Kevin Costner
 

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